I have a new Payne

I went to the doctor today voluntarily for the first time in over a decade (emergencies not included). I have a pain in my neck that has gone unabated for over a week. I decided that while finding out about the growing inconvenience evolving into sheer annoyance, I might as well use the insurance I pay for and get some of it back come tax time by doing a full physical.

Well, we are all happy to know that I am a specimen of good health except for one thing. My new doctor says I have unexplained high blood pressure - 150/100. What she actually said the first time she took my pressure reading was, “Interesting.” She did the test three more times on three more machines. It never changed. 150/100 four times in a row. She then informed me that it’s something of an anomaly given my overall health, but a trend of high blood pressure due to hypertension is something they’ve been seeing happen to younger and younger people.
But not that high.
Not in a relaxed state.
Not in such good health.

There’s no need for medication or anything like that at this point. I have to do the usual battery of blood tests and she gave me a lifestyle plan to follow over the next six weeks which includes adjusting my diet and “intake habits” during which we'll track the pressure bi-weekly.

None of this helps or affects the constant pain in my neck though. She said that is most likely due to something I am doing (unconsciously, habitually, while asleep, ??? ) and I should see a physiotherapist before doing anything else. I did get a "new" bed yesterday, and last night I did sleep better than I have in ages. So perhaps that's part of it, or hopefully solves all of the above. Lack of sleep can cause these things, right?

Oh, the best part of this is the beginning. I chose the doctor because her surname is Payne.

Headaches

I woke up every day this week with a headache and an annoying niggling pain at the base of my skull. The headache is so constant I am afraid I’m becoming accustomed to it. You always read about or see on television people who have been living with this or that for so many years. I don’t want to be one of those people. I like the freedom of life without pain. I enjoy and celebrate the ability to do what I want, how I want, when I want. It is not a part of life I ever take for granted. I know the consequences of the risks I take every day and I cherish the ability to still have that option to take those risks.
But this pain I have been living with recently... It has to go. Soon.

New work

Click, click, boom.

A few months have passed and I have allowed myself to slip into a state of apathy outside of the routine. I have forgiven and rededicated myself. It's time to get going again.

Found

The passion that comes with doing, while forgetting the reward for action, is fabulous. I found that by thinking nothing, not hoping for anything, just getting up and doing, there was an innocence I had once lost come creeping back into my movement. Fluidity, grace and form flourished out of unrehearsed motions.
Today, having recovered this ... art of creativity ... I made it my method. And it worked. Finally. Perhaps it will continue. Perhaps I have truly found how more is less in practicality.

It will only get hotter.

it's warmer here than i remembered. there's at least one fan in every room... even the rooms with a/c. the bed i grew up on is oddly bouncier yet firmer than the one i sleep on ritually. too bad it's also smaller. despite the hustle i once successfully escaped, i haven't felt it creep back in. then again, it's sunday. tomorrow, traffic, business, plans, things to do, will raise their hydra's heads and try to bite me. tomorrow will remind me of the heat i forgot.

What's left?

I have found lately I am paddling in circles in creative doldrums. There is no inspiration to write/draw/design, only the desire to do so exists - and that desire is getting overwhelming. I fear that my talent is being monopolised by its commercial demands, and not discovering new and exciting non-work-related challenges.
wah wah wah - stop coplaining and do something about it, right?
Right.

Spark

there, in the distance, a darkness grew. small at first, but sure as night takes over day, it grew. i knew the time had come... my time had come. we had said goodbye already. it was time to ....

www.oneword.com

Run

finding the floor was difficult to a man with no vision... vision lost before he knew the difference between red apples and green mangoes. left. right. just go Sam. just go.

They give you a word and a few seconds to write whatever comes to mind. Then you're published.
Check it out - www.oneword.com

Eye shadow and confetti

Ring! Ring! My phone rang.
"I'm leaving in the morning."
So why are you mad?

shifting between

vacations are great.
mornings are slower. the sun sets later and with more colours. birds sing louder. drives seem longer and destinations are worth the journey. people are friendlier and more smiles are genuine.

vacations are great.
you kiss in public ... more. you hold hands and swing when you walk. you do new things with old friends. you laugh louder.

vacations are great.
you only check one email... once a week. you only turn on the phone to find out the time because you don't wear a watch. you miss breakfast but find a plate saved just for you.

vacations are great.
i want to feel like i am on vacation when i get back. i want to remember the things i forgot. i want to hold on to the mentality that lets me know i'm alive, not just existing. i want to do the everyday without the mundane. i want to feel and experience, not just be there.

vacations are great.
you don't use the shift key.

Which came first...

Ask any scientist, bookie, logistician or crackhead... actuality always transcends probability. Ergo, the chicken (actuality) came before the egg (probability).

It can truly be said that art imitates life. There undeniably exists a basis for any given inspiration. But inspiration in of itself cannot create action, only the motivation for said possible action(s). One depends on the other. Of course, once any action has been initiated, the cycle between thought and deed can be eternal, eventually making the origin difficult to decipher.

But believe me, art imitates life.

Morning

"To sleep, perchance to dream- ay, there's the rub." Hamlet (III, i, 65-68)

Last night the fan exploded, my brain overheated and the mosquitoes feasted.

Last night I didn't get six seconds of sleep.

At 1:13 a.m I was staring at a standing fan spin in the dark corner of a moonlit room. I watched, unblinking, as it erupted in a yellow orange flame, accompanied by a gunshot snap, followed by a fleeting puff of smoke. This does not help one get sleep. I'm not sure what it gets you, but it's not sleep.

Not five seconds of sleep.

At 1:36 a.m., the Stygian air held kamikaze insects, the sounds of a hundred unidentifiable creatures and the unbearable stench of three dogs who don't care to go outside to release their gas. The only problem with locking anything out, is that you lock everything else in.

Not four seconds of sleep.

At 1:57 a.m., I was convinced I had just had a near fatal altercation with someone who I couldn't get out of my head. I vividly remember a bone snapping. No words are clear, but the name, face, and completely fabricated sequences haunted my wide open, and increasingly frustrated eyes and mind.

Not three seconds of sleep.

By 2:23 a.m. I was franticly struggling to find reality somewhere in a world tainted with over active synapses and delirium... it was not a nice place. Thoughts imagined were confused infused miscued with actions all too real. I was battling consequences to events I had imagined and was doubting the actualities before me.

Not two seconds of sleep.

It's ... bothering how something you have no prior emotional physical rational association with can creep in and take over your mind like a fog. No matter what beam you use, all you see is the blasted fog. What's even more bothering is you don't know what decision to take to get out - drive slower and keep your eyes peeled on the inches in front, twist the throttle flat out and rush towards the inevitable, or just shut the engine off and sit it out.

Not one second of sleep.

Thank God for late night television, cold water, warm sugar buns and sunrise.

Who needs sleep when you can witness the moment that tomorrow has finally come.

Remember.

It is vitally important that you remember to do it.
Whatever you say you're going to do - daily, weekly, monthly, annually, or even once in this lifetime - remember and strive to do it. You must never neglect or put off what you set out to do. It is akin to having a second home you only reside in once a year. Keep a window open and have someone give it a once over every so often. Nothing breaks down a house like having no occupancy.
And even when you don't have a plan, do something. Stop talking and start doing. You won't regret it.

Denise Belfon - Licks/Energy

The music video we did for Saucy Wow. Our first video as a company was project/investment which turned out fantastic (I humbly state). Look out for many more.
Enjoy

On the fly...

My interview with:
Empress Jeanille


and Ju-Ju

It's the end...

It's the end of the world and we know it...

There comes a point when you have to admit you're going to lose. Not mercy rule or some other arbitrary system. It may have been a close game or a blow out, but at some point, you know ... you've lost.
This is that point.
The game isn't over, but you already know the outcome. The final score is just a mathematical issue for the bookies. In this final period, you really learn the true character of the players. The result is inevitable, but I am curious to see how it will end.

...and I feel fine.

The heat today

... is downright unbearable. The AC is on full blast and I still just want to take off my clothes, flood my office and wallow in the result. There should be some labour provision for workforce effectiveness on days like this. What do you say we all go s-dipping and chuck in the rest of the week? I know I'd be really productive next time around.

Letter of the day - "C" for craving

A round cookie with one bite out of it
Looks like a C
A round donut with one bite out of it
Also looks like a C
But it is not as good as a cookie
Oh and the moon sometimes looks like a C
But you can't eat that, so ......
C is for cookie, that's good enough for me, yeah!

Remember those days?

When the hardest thing you had to do was sing along with a muppet whose personality is now re-scripted because someone somewhere decided that a snack obsession was not a healthy characteristic to portray and that educational programming should not assume that their audience has a functional brain and isn't hand fed every scrap of information it will base its entire behavioural psychology around?

Yeah... those were the days.

I like chocolate chip cookies. A lot. Especially the freshly baked ones where the chips are all still warm, gooey and moist. Chips Ahoy will do too.

Go us.

We are pretty much finished with Denise Belfon's new music video and it looks like we're getting to do a few more, as well as some other artistes. Yaye team!

Happy Surfday

The ocean swell we have all been hoping and waiting for is upon us. Those who need to will take a day off from work to make sure they get in on this... yours truly included. Most predictions are for 15-18 ft. waves. Most of the guys who fix boards are very busy right now, and they'll probably be even busier after the weekend. Pray for us.

Free Wallpaper : Piece of Work

Today

Today I was faced with a friend who was bored professionally. I remember when boredom was a distant concept to me. I also remember when it was all to common.
"How do I get back to the point where I wasn't bored?" she asked.
"Why go back when there's so much ahead," was my response.
What we needed to do was move forward. Progress to a new stage where boredom had no footing and every new day was not only a challenge to her expanding career, but a dare to her creative inertia. Of course it is one thing to say this is the way to go, and another to go. I'm not worried though, she's one of the few women in know who can implement logic rather than emotion at will, and follow it.

I need to save $4,000 in two months in order to enjoy my upcoming vacation without too much concern. It's tax month. Yippee.

The simple joys.

Tomorrow the madness begins. The 1st Annual St. Lucia Music Awards concept starts becoming a tangible reality tomorrow at 9am.
Joy?
Suppliers who are hard to give a commitment, volunteers who think they are union workers, artistes who think they are divas, too many who do not even think, the set-up, the last minute additions and cancellations, the moment when everyone and their uncle wants to be in charge...... we all finally will be working towards Friday in the same location.
Joy.
At least it is starting. That means it is happening. Years of talking and months of planning are finally going to come to actuality. Regardless of how it turns out, we will prove the critics wrong while simultaneously giving them a whole new batch of toys to criticise, the small minded folks that they are. But at least we will have done it. And in that much, they cannot find fault.
Joy!

I must be blessed

I went to KFC for lunch. Perhaps that was the mistake I made. I parked the bike right in front of the door, bought a sandwich and fries and sat down to eat. When I came out my bike was gone. Did I mention this was lunchtime? 12 noon on a busy street.
A call to an officer friend (biker cop of course) and patience was all I had. We (two armed officers and myself) went into a notorious neighbourhood in search of my bike. Around every corner, in every alley, on almost every stoop, was a bike. And while everyone knew me and my bike (it is a unique machine to the island) no one saw it recently.
Luck changed when an older man who was clearly unhappy with the way his community was being negatively (albeit accurately) typecast dropped a clue that pointed us in the right direction, only to be set upon by an idiot who, in front of the officers, offered to give me information for a reward.
Within 15 minutes I had my bike back with minor damages where they unsuccessfully tried to hot wire a machine that shuts down it's electrical system at multiple points, and scrapes from passing it along too many narrow alleyways, and one arrest was made.
I bought a round of Guinness for all the old men hanging around and they had a smile and another chapter to add to an all too familiar yet never ending book.
It all goes to show that who you know is so important. There were other police officers who happened to be on the scene and when I told them the situation they said, "Go file a report with CID" and left. My friend said if we hadn't gone in there within an hour, my bike was history. Hail the force.

Click click boom.

I am now Creative Director (started Jan. 2008). I assumed the role at the height of agency activity: producing the nation's first (and intended annual) Music Awards, an aggressive move to maintain or reorganise our existing client relationships in light of constantly changing factors both past and present, a revolving door in areas of staff, restructuring the creative and production departments, the impending but ever postponing move to the new building... what a way to start the year.
It ain't all happy meals and fries, but I'm lovin' it!